“Things that excite you are not random; they are connected to your purpose. Follow them.”
Purpose. Doesn’t everyone want purpose? Maybe not, but I do.
When I was little I wanted to be a vet, I wanted to be Indiana Jones, I wanted to be a marine biologist. I wanted to go to Harvard, Oxford, I wanted lots of things. Did I do them? Some. Is my life over? No. Sadly, because I have a child, people try to tell me that. It’s “selfish” to want things for myself. Things that don’t necessarily involve my family directly. Why is that as moms (parents) we have to give up dreams? WE DON’T.
Let Go Of Excuses
I graduated high school early, moved out the next week and started my first semester of college that same month. I thought I was awesome and grown up. Fast forward to 2015ish, I was in debt, had dropped out of 3 colleges, had hit rock bottom and got a bad ticket, and I was depressed. Oh boy was I depressed. I had plans, I had dreams, did I care? Nope. I used to say it was the current boyfriend’s fault, or I needed to work. Every now and then I’d decide to blame my parents, something of that nature. Why did I continue to push my wants aside? I was lazy. I had a chip on my shoulder, was full of self-hatred and ego all at the same time, it was toxic.
Here I am, 2018, and thinking, “Why do we do these things?”. Maybe you’re not a 20 year old drop out drinking cheap beer and living paycheck to paycheck, maybe you’re a 40 year old mom wondering why no one asked you what YOU wanted out of life. Well… I am here to tell you that no one is going to make it happen but you. Not your counselor, not your significant other, not whatever higher power you believe in, you are the biggest supporter that you have. It took me getting pregnant and having a daughter to find my motivation to succeed. I wanted to be able to support my daughter in myself in a worst case scenario. I want to live a vibrant, fulfilling life to give her something to aspire to. Kids don’t ruin your life and chances, crap attitudes and lack of drive does. You have to want it, sit up at night planning, lose sleep, network, make it happen!
What Excites You?
I am not talking about your bucket list; My mile long bucket list includes many things such as getting my pilots license, owning a vineyard, taking Harper to Machu Pichu, and owning a few octopi. While all cool things, I don’t think I want to make a career out of them. Although professional octopus wrangler does sound pretty nifty.
I am talking about things that light you up inside. That you can imagine yourself doing. A path that would make your soul soar and bring you pure happiness.
Some things I am trying to plan for in the future is I want to open my own business. I want to open a coffee shop and/or tea room for people to come hang out and chat with me, read a good book, talk about atoms and aliens, or nothing at all. I plan to offer childcare so that mom’s can have a guilt free place to just wind down, get work done, whatever they need. I also plan to go back to school and want to be a history teacher. I mean, that’s as close to Indiana Jones as I think I can get! I want to write a book(s) for Harper. An adventure series surrounding her that will also include historical/geographic facts. How cool would it be to have a book all about you and adventures you can go on? All of these things I want to and WILL do.
Think, Plan, Execute
I might sound like a corny self help book, but really, there’s no better time than right now. Even if you just make a plan. I have 7 notebooks I write in daily. My main planner, my budget planner, than some for each goal I have and my steps and plans for them. I’m a big writing person, so it helps to brain dump every now and then. Write what makes you happy, write what doesn’t. Look through your social media, what are things that are trending in your likes? Food, travel, clothing? Anything you see that you consistently enjoy, figure out why. I am a HUGE Pinterest fan. Most of my plans have come from there and I find it to be a great platform, now there’s even categories inside boards, literally everything I have ever wanted. Do your research. Want to start a business but you’re broke? There’s loans, grants, saving; network with people. To succeed you must go out of your comfort zone. Is it easy for me to post to my friends and family knowing that a lot of people are probably rolling their eyes and scrolling past? Nope. It’s hard, it can be embarrassing. But want to know the difference, I am working towards making my life what I want it to be. Are you? Start.
Xoxo
Shayla